18 Comments
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M.P. Fitzgerald's avatar

This is the FUNNIEST GODDAMN THING! Oh my god.

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Thaddeus Thomas's avatar

That's hilarious!

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Zani D's avatar

thank you! curious what accent your brain went with?

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Thaddeus Thomas's avatar

Bronx, I think.

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Pablo Báez's avatar

Yo'! This was a GOOD piece to smoke to.

If one catches early on, you can start filling the blanks with I can best explain as subtext, but not sure that's entirely how the info's being delivered.

Almost like reading invisible sentences in between the what's visible.

How it ties close to the end is brilliant. The funny shifts into the sinister but doesn't give it power to be entirely so by leaving it grounded in its mockery. Really fucking good.

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Zani D's avatar

My favorite part might be where he got so flustered at being interrupted he says "overrun our jobs and steal our borders" 😆

I spent a decade Florida, these guys wrote themselves once I got going. I'm glad the mockery came through strong, I was very annoyed at the prompt and wanted to make damn sure I stayed within bounds without making them toothless.

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Pablo Báez's avatar

I enjoyed that bit haha

The contrast between the dialect and the forced "smart talk" is also funny

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Zani D's avatar

you got it! it's a one sided dialogue, your brain is supposed to fill in the blanks based on context and your experience. some people read them as old men, some people read them as southern and some as Appalachian, it's been a neat little experiment.

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ARC's avatar

good work

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Nick Winney's avatar

you have written well, padowan. Hyperobject...had me thinking of a space age futuristic lawyer (like my goodself) <ahem> hyperobjecting to egregious mega-hearsay.

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Zani D's avatar

Thank you good sir! It was far more enjoyable to complete than I thought it would be.

I can't write seriously about nationalists.

It's necessary that some do, and it doesn't need to be me.

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Emil Ottoman's avatar

I was honestly wondering how you would stuff hyperobject in there...

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Zani D's avatar

I was so fucking annoyed by that word. I was so fuckin annoyed by all the words. This entire prompt was terrible and you loved it.

But yes, the hyperobject schtick inspired the rest of the concept.

"What's a hyperobject?"

"It's a concept beyond our comprehension"

"You callin me stupid?"

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George Kalantzis's avatar

Seeing stuff from you on this date now wicked

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Emil Ottoman's avatar

Oh, right, Stripmall Horse! I'll do that! HAH!

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Zani D's avatar

Parking lots and St Luigi, we're losing the moment!

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Emil Ottoman's avatar

After the prompt party!!! We're having a day over here (he says to the dying woman... ba dum tiss.)

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Zani D's avatar

you know I'm patient ❤️‍🩹

...my liver isn't but it can't talk back

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